Q. My parents are in their 70s and living on their own. They both have some health issues, so I help them with appointments, errands, and tasks around the house. I love spending time with them, but I also have my own busy family, and lately I have been feeling overwhelmed. Is it wrong to feel this way.
A. Feeling overwhelmed doesn’t mean you don’t love your parents or your family. It means you’re human. Taking care of our parents as they age can be deeply rewarding, but it can also be stressful, especially when you add in the responsibilities of caring for your own family. It’s totally normal for you to feel overwhelmed at times. You’re not alone, a study by the Pew Research Center found that nearly a quarter of U.S. adults are part of the Sandwich Generation: caring for both aging parents and dependent children. In fact, July is National Sandwich Generation month. With summer in full swing, it’s the perfect time to pause, recharge, and consider ways to make things feel more manageable. The National Institute on Aging offers the following tips for caregivers on reducing stress.
Ask for help: It’s okay to ask family or friends to step in and lend a hand or to hire a professional for some tasks. You don’t have to do it all yourself.
Practice self-care: Make sure you don’t forget about your own health. Exercise can improve your mood and help you unwind. Try to eat well-balanced meals and get enough sleep.
Schedule time for yourself: It’s wonderful that you love spending time with your parents and that you stay busy with your own family. Try to make time for other things you enjoy as well. A walk or a chat with a friend can help you relax.
Join a support group: Many family caregivers have found participating in a group is a good way to share advice and connect with others who can relate to your experience. AgeSpan’s Family Caregiver Support Program offers various services for caregivers, including virtual and in-person support groups. Visit agespan.org for more information on these programs.
Caring for both your parents and your own family can feel like a balancing act. It’s okay to admit that it’s hard sometimes. You’re doing your best, and that’s what really matters. When you take time to rest and recharge, you’ll be better able to care for the people you love.
It’s never too late to start strength training and feel stronger in your daily life.
Are you caring for an older adult or need help finding healthy aging resources? Our experienced staff is available to help. Visit us online at www.agespan.org. You can also call 800-892-0890 or email info@agespan.org.
Joan Hatem-Roy is the chief executive officer of AgeSpan, which serves the following cities and towns: Amesbury, Andover, Billerica, Boxford, Chelmsford, Danvers, Dracut, Dunstable, Georgetown, Groveland, Haverhill, Lawrence, Lowell, Marblehead, Merrimac, Methuen, Middleton, Newbury, Newburyport, North Andover, Peabody, Rowley, Salisbury, Salem, Tewksbury, Tyngsboro, Westford, and West Newbury.
First published in the Eagle-Tribune.
